Undercover Boss

Matthew 10:40–42

Perhaps some of you have seen the show Undercover Boss. [SLIDE #1] The basic premise of the show is this — the owner, CEO, president, or other head of a company takes a low level, ordinary job in the company “undercover” to see what things are really like.

Really like in the day-to-day operation of their business.

Really like in the real lives of people who work for them at the low end of their pay scale.

A common plot line is this: The CEO/owner/president’s eyes are opened to the very difficult lives of some of their lowest paid employees who have made considerable sacrifices for the company. I’m sure the story lines are made for TV, but the business owners end up often making changes to their businesses or rewarding the hard-working, lowly employee whom they encountered.

It is a nice show. They only thing is — they stole the idea from Jesus Christ.

The blueprint is our Scripture this morning. Christ is in whomever we welcome (or don’t) undercover.

Whatever we do to or for someone else, especially the most vulnerable we do to Jesus Christ. Of course, if we knew Jesus was coming over for dinner, we’d be on our best behavior, make the best meal we know, and roll out the red carpet. But in truth, our character is revealed when in private, when doing the everyday ordinary things. We can all brush up our character for a brief period of time when welcoming important people. Think of it like this — I can take on the qualities of a fish and swim under water for a period of time. I can even grow in my lung capacity to be able to fool people for a longer period of time. But, you can only fake being a fish for so long. If someone watches me swim for longer than a minute, they will soon see the truth.

There’s another common story line in the Undercover Boss show. Sometimes the undercover boss finds workers acting selfishly, without excellence or compassion in a way that transgresses the company’s values. There ends up being consequences — sometimes in the form of a lost job, but perhaps more significantly, by contrast to those episodes where you see the Undercover Boss rewarding an employee with his or her own franchise location, new house, or scholarship, they have a huge missed opportunity.

We see this in our Scripture today too. In the passage there is no threat of punishment per se. But Jesus does say — those who show welcome and hospitality will not lose their reward. And by implication — those who don’t show welcome — they do lose their reward.

So is this a divine version of Undercover Boss? One where if God is watching while we dutifully show hospitality to a prophet, righteous person, or a little one, then we win a prize? The goal being to be doing good at the right time. And the right time being when God is watching.

The rewards Jesus speaks of are not franchise locations, new homes, or scholarships. And we might be tempted to think Jesus is speaking of the hereafter — of heaven. And perhaps that’s part of it. But he never explicitly says so.

I believe there’s another way of looking at this passage that takes us beyond this “Undercover Boss” paradigm. Beyond just being caught doing what’s right, just at the right moment. Rather, I want to suggest this morning that the rewards are actually baked into the practice of welcoming itself in multiple ways.

What if we assumed that every person had something of value for us. Something beautiful to behold. What if the people in our lives, that we have some chance to welcome, are themselves the rewards.

Then there is no secret benefactor behind the scenes to possibly reward us. Rather, in order to secure our reward we have to hold our hospitality in such a way; we have to regard those who come to us in a certain way. Both as things of great value and as people bearing gifts that we could not obtain on our own. Our worlds, our universes, our homes are expanded when we welcome others into them. Why is this so?

Every person is gifted at some things that you are not.

Or they are gifted differently than you.

They have had experiences that you have not.

The books they’ve read, the people they know, their upbringing, their vocation,

Has all shaped them differently.

All of that can rub off onto you. And bless you — expand your world, your universe, your spirit and soul.

Well, that’s all well and good preacher. We can indeed learn and grow from good house guests.

But sometimes, frankly, people can be a pain in the ass.

Worse still, even abusive.

Should we welcome these?

In a way, yes.

Sometimes the gift that people have to give us is to help us strengthen our ability to set boundaries. And so, in the case of abuse, bullying, or harassment, we can paradoxically welcome someone even who intends us harm, by only welcoming from them the gift that strengthens our resolve, helps us clarify our values, and/or make clear our boundaries.

Others who just evoke within us a sense of discomfort, they too give us an opportunity to grow by practicing certain emotional and spiritual muscle groups. Perhaps that is defusing emotional situations. Perhaps it is learning to live in tension. Perhaps it is refining our discernment over what to tolerate and what not to tolerate.

Everyone has something to offer. And welcome is a spiritual practice that helps us to integrate the best of what people have to offer us into our lives or, like an alchemist, convert their toxicity into something beautiful or useful in our own journey.

Whenever we engage in the practice of welcoming — not only are there these outward acts towards someone — whether that be making dinner, fluffing pillows, rolling out the red carpet or whatever — there is an emotional process that goes on inside our own hearts. Sometimes, we’re excited to welcome someone. Other times we are fearful. Sometimes sad or angry. Often this is a mixture of many different types of emotions going on when we welcome someone. And before I go into that a bit more, let me say — welcoming someone is not just about physically taking them into your home. It may be having patience when them during a conversation or on social media. It may be in how you talk with others about them when they are not even present at all. It is an act of making the appropriate and holy space for someone in your heart.

Sometimes the person we need to welcome the most is ourselves. And the emotions going on within. In Jesus’s teaching, it is interesting who he tells us to welcome. And the welcome of anyone is simultaneously the welcome of the one who sent them. And so Jesus tell us to welcome him and that by doing so, we welcome God into our lives. But also prophets and righteous and by extension, the ones who send them. None of this is surprising or even counter-intuitive. But the climax of this teaching is in verse 42. Even the smallest acts of welcome to the smallest people — “little ones” Jesus says have rewards for us. How we welcome the little ones in our lives — from children, those who are just learning, the marginalized, the ordinary, those without power — reveals who we truly are. And our rewards are commensurate with our true and genuine character, not just how we act when we are “on.”

I believe part of what happens when we don’t welcome people and even emotional processes in our lives — we repress genuine things that are trying to surface in our lives. The gifts that people have to offer us — they already exist as potential territory in our own spiritual lives, but when we don’t welcome them, we cut our conscience self off from these parts of our selves. In psychology, this is called repression. And it tends to manifest itself in ugly ways in our lives — acting out, addictive or destructive behaviors, numbing behaviors. This stuff comes out one way or the other and if it cannot come out consciously, it comes out unconsciously in attitudes and behaviors that have control over us, rather than the other way around.

There’s a practice called the Welcoming Prayer that can help us cultivate this spiritual practice within our lives. If you feel like I’m bordering on pscyho-babble, I especially encourage you to give this practice a try as I lead us through it.

The welcoming prayer can take different forms, but in short, it is a prayer that observes the emotions and thoughts arising from within and seeks to make space for them in your life, rather than deny them. And what you practice in your heart and mind in your prayer life, you can put in practice in your real life. What you do with little ones — even the smallest thoughts within — in the name of a disciple of Jesus Christ — is intimately related to what you get out of your faith.

I’ll first walk us through the basic steps more generally and then we’ll practice the prayer together.

One of my favorite authors and spiritual directors, the Rev. Cynthia Bourgeault, teaches the Welcome Prayer in three stages:

1. Focus and Sink In

2. Welcome

3. Let Go

First, Focus and Sink In:

“To focus on the upset means to feel it as sensation in your body. If it is a physical pain, like a toothache or backache, you become very present to it, putting your full attention inside it. Exactly the same is true for emotional upset. If you are angry, see if you can be present to how anger is manifesting in you. Is your jaw clenched? Is your stomach in knots? If fear is present, what is the sensation of fear? See if you can pay attention to what it feels like inside you. Is your breath short? Is there a sense of vertigo, or a stampede of “fight or flight” adrenaline? Don’t try to change anything, just be present.”

Cynthia Bourgeault. Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening (Kindle Locations 1480–1481). Kindle Edition.

Second comes the welcome:

Bourgeault says, “Now comes the most inscrutable and counterintuitive instruction in the whole method. Sitting there, steeped in the whole roiling sensation of your upset, you begin to say, ever so gently, “Welcome, anger” (or whatever the emotion is), “Welcome anger.” If it’s physical pain, the same drill applies: “Welcome, pain, welcome. How’s that again? If this intrusive, upsetting emotion is what necessitated the practice in the first place, why are we welcoming it? Isn’t the goal to get rid of it? Actually, no. The goal is not to let it chase you out of presence. Admittedly, this teaching is paradoxical. Common sense tells you that the unruly emotion is the problem and the solution is to eliminate it. But by welcoming it instead, you create an atmosphere of inner hospitality. By embracing the thing you once defended yourself against or ran from, you are actually disarming it, removing its power to hurt you or chase you back into your smaller self.”

Cynthia Bourgeault. Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening (Kindle Locations 1493–1499). Kindle Edition.

Lastly, Let Go.

Again, Bourgeault says, “Don’t get to this step too quickly. The real work in the Welcoming Prayer is actually accomplished in the first two steps. Stay with them — rather like kneading a charley horse in your leg-going back and forth between “focusing” and “welcoming” until the knot begins to dissolve of its own accord. And yes, “letting go” is also just for now. This is not a final, forever renunciation of your anger or fear; it’s simply a way of gently waving farewell as the emotion starts to recede. If you simply can’t in good conscience move to this step, don’t fake it; the bulk of the work has really been accomplished. When you are ready to let go…you simply say something like “I let go of my anger,” or, if you prefer, “I give my anger to God.,”

Cynthia Bourgeault. Centering Prayer and Inner Awakening (Kindle Locations 1523–1528). Kindle Edition.

Okay, so let’s try this. It is probably better to do it on your own, so you can go at your own pace, but this will be good practice. This specific welcoming prayer that I will use in a bit was written by Father Thomas Keating. As I pray this prayer, you may wish to close your eyes and follow along as I slowly pray it. The words will be on the screen and on the worship page, should you wish to return to them at some later time.

Ill begin in silence for younto focus and sink into whatever emotions, thoughts and sensations are present with you at the moment. Then, I’ll lead us slowly in a spoken welcoming prayer.

[SLIDE #2]

Welcome, welcome, welcome.

I welcome everything that comes to me today

because I know it’s for my healing.

I welcome all thoughts, feelings, emotions, persons,

situations, and conditions.

I let go of my desire for power and control.

I let go of my desire for affection, esteem,

approval and pleasure.

I let go of my desire for survival and security.

[SLIDE #3]

I let go of my desire to change any situation,

condition, person or myself.

I open to the love and presence of God and

God’s action within. Amen

Friends, whoever gives even a cup of cold water to one of these little ones — in the name of a disciple — truly, I tell you, none of these will lose their reward. In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, Amen